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With a hot, powerful car? Don't I wish.
I'm shaking inside. Fear of life? It's certainly not the fear of death, because (by this point in my life) suicidal ideation is a familiar companion. Death would solve so many problems for me. Life -- now that's hard. On days like today, it's just a matter of putting one foot in front of the other. One step at a time.
At least the Matrix RP is proceeding well. An excellent chat with Puck last night opened up a whole new corner of the universe (funny how they just seem to be there, as if just waiting patiently to be discovered). Ah, Shepherd, help is on the way... *smiles at the thought*. Neo and Smith have become almost second nature to me.... well, except for the way that playing Smith for any sustained length of time tends to wrack up my brain. Neo's transcendent dimension as the One is perhaps equally difficult to get my head around, but at least it doesn't leave me feeling like someone lightly sandpapered my cerebral cortex. *grin* Lest anyone take this as a request to stop the RP -- don't. It has a lot of meaning for me. And I MUST get back into the AI RP soon.... Joe has been nudging me. I just don't want to tread on Ruby's toes, since she lost some relatives in the recent tsunami...
Off to paint Star Wars flats: as usual, a few hours behind schedule. I just can't seem to get out of bed when the alarm goes off. It takes all my courage to finally drag myself out from the safety of the blankets. *kicks self for apparently needing 10-12 hours of sleep a night just to stay sane* And we need a cheque out of this by Tuesday morning to pay the rent. God damn it.
Hi ho, hi ho. You know the rest.
Oh, and a picture of Emmie, just so there's something that made the entry worth reading:
Caption: *sigh* Humans...
I'm shaking inside. Fear of life? It's certainly not the fear of death, because (by this point in my life) suicidal ideation is a familiar companion. Death would solve so many problems for me. Life -- now that's hard. On days like today, it's just a matter of putting one foot in front of the other. One step at a time.
At least the Matrix RP is proceeding well. An excellent chat with Puck last night opened up a whole new corner of the universe (funny how they just seem to be there, as if just waiting patiently to be discovered). Ah, Shepherd, help is on the way... *smiles at the thought*. Neo and Smith have become almost second nature to me.... well, except for the way that playing Smith for any sustained length of time tends to wrack up my brain. Neo's transcendent dimension as the One is perhaps equally difficult to get my head around, but at least it doesn't leave me feeling like someone lightly sandpapered my cerebral cortex. *grin* Lest anyone take this as a request to stop the RP -- don't. It has a lot of meaning for me. And I MUST get back into the AI RP soon.... Joe has been nudging me. I just don't want to tread on Ruby's toes, since she lost some relatives in the recent tsunami...
Off to paint Star Wars flats: as usual, a few hours behind schedule. I just can't seem to get out of bed when the alarm goes off. It takes all my courage to finally drag myself out from the safety of the blankets. *kicks self for apparently needing 10-12 hours of sleep a night just to stay sane* And we need a cheque out of this by Tuesday morning to pay the rent. God damn it.
Hi ho, hi ho. You know the rest.
Oh, and a picture of Emmie, just so there's something that made the entry worth reading:
Caption: *sigh* Humans...
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(no subject)
Cute pic of Emmie..I love her expression, too priceless!