bear with a mouthful of sore teeth

[crowdog66]

Woke up today in incredible overall physical and mental pain. A couple of tranquillizers dulled it a bit.

I want to go down to the hospital and make them give me whatever they've got to make it STOP. I want to call up my friends and ask them to do something -- anything -- to distract me from this. But nothing will help now. I want to gnaw off my own arm and get away... and if that would help, I'd do it in a second. Nothing could hurt worse than this.

God, I'm such a pussy, aren't I? People live with chronic pain every day, and I'm starting to lose it over this. All I want to do is scream, and scream, and scream.

Comments

[matrixrefugee.livejournal.com]

I have to admit, the "Bear with a mouthful of rotten teeth" metaphor makes me smile, but it's a sad smile...

Emotional pain has to be the worst pain there is: I've had some very insensitive people try to tell me otherwise, but I know from experience that they haven't a frickin' *CLUE* what it's like to have a weight on your soul. I often wish that I could dump the pain that I have known and still know onto them just to see if they could handle it any better. I doubt they'd last an instant. A friend of mine "Karl" has cerebral palsy that makes it hard for him to walk, plus he also has a depression problem related to his being abused as a child; he and I somehow got into a discussion of physical pain versus emotional pain, and he said if he could get rid of either one, he'd prefer to be rid of the depression, even though his handicap is much more noticeable. Being slightly handicapped myself (My therapist thinks I may have Asperger's Syndrome, a condition somewhat similar to autism, but which can best be described, as I explain it to people, as a clinical version of the classic absent-minded professor's behavior.), I had to agree with him...

Remember that I am there for you, and that I carry your name in my heart...