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And the winners are in for the 2006 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. The object of the game is to create the worst opening sentence for a hypothetical novel, and the whole endeavor was inspired by a real opening sentence by a real author:
"It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness."
-- Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, "Paul Clifford" (1830)
Pretty convoluted, eh? Not to mention verbose. And purple. Makes me want to dig out the novel and read the whole thing... well, okay, maybe not.
This year's grand prize goes to:
Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean.
-- Jim Guigli of Carmichael, CA
The whole winner's list is well worth a read. Have fun!
(Oh, and I actually know someone locally who got onto the Dishonourable Mentions list one year... Terri, if you read this, what year did Roger win?)
"It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness."
-- Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, "Paul Clifford" (1830)
Pretty convoluted, eh? Not to mention verbose. And purple. Makes me want to dig out the novel and read the whole thing... well, okay, maybe not.
This year's grand prize goes to:
Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean.
-- Jim Guigli of Carmichael, CA
The whole winner's list is well worth a read. Have fun!
(Oh, and I actually know someone locally who got onto the Dishonourable Mentions list one year... Terri, if you read this, what year did Roger win?)
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