1.5 hours

[crowdog66]

That's how long I lasted at Ipsos tonight. 90 minutes. The lingering depression from the flu/bronchitis/lack of exercise led to a panic state, and I lost the ability to function in such a way that I could maintain quality and respondant control on interviews.

I feel lower than a snake's belly right now. Like absolute shit. Like a failure, and the worst part? Right now I feel like I could never go back.

After I left work I pigged out on A&W burgers and fries (indulging in comfort food and punishing myself in one swoop), then came home and talked briefly with George before taking a tranquillizer and going to bed. But I just couldn't get to sleep; my mind is in too much turmoil. So here I am, on the net. Not that it's going to help.

Comforting myself with sugar-free lemon hard candies and trying not to think about tomorrow...

Comments

[matrixrefugee.livejournal.com]

Hey, I had a shift that lasted that long, not too long ago when I had an annoying, lingering cough with some chest congestion. It happens to the best of us. ::Offers chocolate::

[metisbutterfly.livejournal.com]

you're being too hard on yourself.
working on the phones is tough for most people during stable times, let alone after you've been ill or had a depressive episode.
You can go back if you wish, i'm sure they will understand, they sound to be good about that stuff, but i would seriously re evaluate why (other than financial, as big as that reason is) you want to stay there? is it beneficial to your health and well being? only you can answer that.
((hugs))

[eastpath.livejournal.com]

I've had those times... *hugs* It doesn't make one feel good... but yea, you should be at tip-top before going to the phones.. those things are evil. *more hugs*

[pink-gecco.livejournal.com]

Try not to be so hard on yourself. You've had a temporary setback because you've been sick. The keywork here is "temporary". You've come so far and have been feeling so much better recently.

Remember, 1 step back, 2 steps forward. You have the strength to get over this, I know you do. Don't beat yourself up about the a&w, either.

Sorry I didn't get to Beltane. I've been sick, too.

[cockatiel-art.livejournal.com]

**HUGGGGGGGGGZ** All Hail the A&W Food binge god ^.^ !