![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
First, the ups:
1) Oh. My. God.
What a difference 37.5 mg of a medication can make. Effexor, I love you and want to have your babies. :-D
I just started my increased dosage on Tuesday (from 37.5 to 75 mg daily), and by Friday I was already feeling the effects. At Ipsos, I was more upbeat and positive, feeling a greater sense of fulfillment and well-being in my work, and it carried over into my voice. I was able to think of positive things and keep my mood up for most of the shift, as opposed to feeling like I was dragging myself over broken glass through every minute. It's not constant relief, but it's a damn-sight better than what I was like a week ago.
2) I think I've finally figured out how to open "Strange Attractors", the Neo/Smith slashfic I've been working on. Woot! It's been a major stumbling block, since how much I reveal at any given point in the story's progression depends entirely on how much information is given in the first sequence.
3) The Matrix RP is now evidently a reality -- when people start drawing up character sheets it's pretty much de facto in progress, even if it came about without any planning and more or less by accident. I have three (possibly four) excellent players lined up, and a whole universe to play around in. MWAH-ha-ha-ha-HAH! Fear my might. (Oddly enough, it's set in the "Strange Attractors" universe, during the third story in the series, which is called "Degrees of Separation" -- hence the players have been referring to it as the Degrees of Separation universe, or simply DegSep.)
4) In reading a book called "The Myths of Motherhood", by Shari L. Thurer, I came across a quotation that just proves that no matter how much things change, human nature remains the same. Guess what time period this comes from?
"Our earth is degenerate in these latter days. Bribery and corruption are common. Children no longer obey their parents... The end of the world is evidently approaching."
It could have been said today, or during the Elizabethan era, or the Middle Ages. Instead, it was inscribed on a clay tablet dating back to Sumerian times, in the third millennium BCE. Five thousand years ago, more or less. And from the same time period... doesn't this sound familiar?
Father: "Where did you go?"
Son: "I did not go anywhere."
Father: "If you did not go anywhere, why do you idle about?.... Go to school! Stand before your teacher, recite your assignment, open your schoolbag, write on your tablet... After you have finished your assignment and reported to your mother, come to me and do not wander about in the street!"
Heh.
5) George just confirmed a job coloring David Ross on "Breakout", a comic for Devil's Due press. This will bring in approximately $1800 Cdn a month, and takes considerable strain off my shoulders. *sobs with relief*
Now the downs:
1) I was sufficiently ill today with a sore throat and general sense of being overwhelmed that I stayed home from both a Yule ritual rehearsal and a Coven of the Sacred Well meeting. Bleh.
2) Northlight's "ShadowBlood" game didn't happen this evening because again, several of the players didn't show up. This vexed me greatly, since I'd set aside time for it specifically. The game is excellent; she really deserves better than what some of these people are giving her. Personally, I'd be screaming by now. Here's to you, Northlight! Don't let the turkeys get you down.
3) General levels of depression still persist -- one of the cruel contradictions of Borderline Personality Disorder is the extreme lability of mood, and the fact that at the same time, one can be highly functional yet in extreme emotional agony. On the plus side, my psychiatrist is taking this seriously and will be seeing me again soon to make sure that the Effexor continues to help me.
And a final thought...
Kittens. They just make me smile.
1) Oh. My. God.
What a difference 37.5 mg of a medication can make. Effexor, I love you and want to have your babies. :-D
I just started my increased dosage on Tuesday (from 37.5 to 75 mg daily), and by Friday I was already feeling the effects. At Ipsos, I was more upbeat and positive, feeling a greater sense of fulfillment and well-being in my work, and it carried over into my voice. I was able to think of positive things and keep my mood up for most of the shift, as opposed to feeling like I was dragging myself over broken glass through every minute. It's not constant relief, but it's a damn-sight better than what I was like a week ago.
2) I think I've finally figured out how to open "Strange Attractors", the Neo/Smith slashfic I've been working on. Woot! It's been a major stumbling block, since how much I reveal at any given point in the story's progression depends entirely on how much information is given in the first sequence.
3) The Matrix RP is now evidently a reality -- when people start drawing up character sheets it's pretty much de facto in progress, even if it came about without any planning and more or less by accident. I have three (possibly four) excellent players lined up, and a whole universe to play around in. MWAH-ha-ha-ha-HAH! Fear my might. (Oddly enough, it's set in the "Strange Attractors" universe, during the third story in the series, which is called "Degrees of Separation" -- hence the players have been referring to it as the Degrees of Separation universe, or simply DegSep.)
4) In reading a book called "The Myths of Motherhood", by Shari L. Thurer, I came across a quotation that just proves that no matter how much things change, human nature remains the same. Guess what time period this comes from?
"Our earth is degenerate in these latter days. Bribery and corruption are common. Children no longer obey their parents... The end of the world is evidently approaching."
It could have been said today, or during the Elizabethan era, or the Middle Ages. Instead, it was inscribed on a clay tablet dating back to Sumerian times, in the third millennium BCE. Five thousand years ago, more or less. And from the same time period... doesn't this sound familiar?
Father: "Where did you go?"
Son: "I did not go anywhere."
Father: "If you did not go anywhere, why do you idle about?.... Go to school! Stand before your teacher, recite your assignment, open your schoolbag, write on your tablet... After you have finished your assignment and reported to your mother, come to me and do not wander about in the street!"
Heh.
5) George just confirmed a job coloring David Ross on "Breakout", a comic for Devil's Due press. This will bring in approximately $1800 Cdn a month, and takes considerable strain off my shoulders. *sobs with relief*
Now the downs:
1) I was sufficiently ill today with a sore throat and general sense of being overwhelmed that I stayed home from both a Yule ritual rehearsal and a Coven of the Sacred Well meeting. Bleh.
2) Northlight's "ShadowBlood" game didn't happen this evening because again, several of the players didn't show up. This vexed me greatly, since I'd set aside time for it specifically. The game is excellent; she really deserves better than what some of these people are giving her. Personally, I'd be screaming by now. Here's to you, Northlight! Don't let the turkeys get you down.
3) General levels of depression still persist -- one of the cruel contradictions of Borderline Personality Disorder is the extreme lability of mood, and the fact that at the same time, one can be highly functional yet in extreme emotional agony. On the plus side, my psychiatrist is taking this seriously and will be seeing me again soon to make sure that the Effexor continues to help me.
And a final thought...
Kittens. They just make me smile.
