crowdog66: (Default)
I just spent 20 minutes sobbing my heart out. Someone posted a mother-related poem on Yahoo!Answers, and reading it totally undid me.

The poem:

Sing me a lullaby
Won't you wipe away my pain
Take me out
Of the driving rain
Sing me a lullaby, keep me warm and dry
Oh, mother, I'm counting on you

To paint me a blue sky
May the colors run true
That I may look to the Heavens
When I search for the truth
Paint me a blue sky
Keep me warm and dry
Oh, mother, I'm counting on you
To paint me a blue sky
Oh, Paint me a blue sky
Oh, paint me a blue sky
Oh, paint me a blue sky, yeah

It seems like so long
I tried to keep it inside
So many people go through life
It seems they just get by
Now I know the truth
Will someone paint me a blue sky

Paint me a blue sky

Hey yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mmmmm...baby a blue sky
Oh, oh, yeah
Pa-iannnt
Mmmmmm...Pai-iant me a blue sky
Lets get someting to fly
So I can try
To paint my mother a blue sky.


*sniffle*

I can count on one hand the number of times I've cried since my mother's death, and this was easily the most painful episode. I just wanted so damned badly to make her smile one more time -- to buy her flowers, to take her out to lunch, to show her some cute cat video or picture. And I'll never be able to do that again, and the pain is like being carried back and forth by ocean surf and dashed against rocks again... and again... and again.

Fortunately George was here so I wasn't alone as I wept. He's lost his mother and a brother, so he understands this kind of pain. I just hope that in his moments of suffering I'm able to comfort him as much as he's able to comfort me.

I'll try to post something light and entertaining later. Right now I've got a fresh cup of coffee and a few MM pages that I want to finish tonight, so it's time to pound back a couple of aspirin and get down to it.
◾ Tags:
Date/Time: 2008-05-11 02:56 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] spotts1701.livejournal.com
*hugs*

Stay strong. I'll keep you in my thoughts.
Date/Time: 2008-05-11 03:28 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] eastpath.livejournal.com
The way it is written seems almost like a song... and yea I can see how that would really do you in considering the collection of memories may/june will bring to you *HUGS* I'm glad you have George there and that he can support you.
Date/Time: 2008-05-11 10:01 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] fire-fox01.livejournal.com
*hugs* I am so sorry. I can't even imagine how hard it must be for you. I hope you feel better soon.
Date/Time: 2008-05-11 14:18 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] greenraven.livejournal.com
:::hug:::
I'm glad you weren't alone.
Date/Time: 2008-05-11 15:45 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] beckyzoole.livejournal.com
I felt like that for the longest time after my Dad died. It's been over seven years, and now the pain hits me only occasionally. But for the first two years -- yeah. I'm with you. It's horrid.

*hugs*
Date/Time: 2008-05-16 11:26 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] deepkissez.livejournal.com
*hugs*

I found the song if you like it.