![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
George just dropped -- AND DENTED -- our almost brand new stainless steel coffee carafe.
*draws a deep breath*
*screams like Ren*
On the other hand, just twenty minutes prior to the denting I put the first stain -- ketchup -- on our green couch. When he saw what I'd done, George actually pumped both fists up in the air and exclaimed: "Oh, God! Oh, that's wonderful! I've been so worried that I would be the first one to stain the couch! Hallelujah! The weight of the world has been lifted from off my shoulders!"
I didn't smack him. Zero tolerance and all that. But it was sure tempting.
We're making coffee right now. Hopefully nothing explodes.
EDITED TO ADD: And another thing that has me howling today...
Dear Automobile Driver:
You know those flashing lights and that loud beeping sound at the pedestrian crosswalk? That means that a pedestrian is, you know, attempting to cross.
It does not mean that you should go faster and blow through the intersection, without, I might add, apparently looking either to the left or to the right.
If they gave out tickets for being an asshole, I would have reported your license plate number to the police immediately.
Sincerely,
Me, crossing at the crosswalk with four heavy bags of groceries
*draws a deep breath*
*screams like Ren*
On the other hand, just twenty minutes prior to the denting I put the first stain -- ketchup -- on our green couch. When he saw what I'd done, George actually pumped both fists up in the air and exclaimed: "Oh, God! Oh, that's wonderful! I've been so worried that I would be the first one to stain the couch! Hallelujah! The weight of the world has been lifted from off my shoulders!"
I didn't smack him. Zero tolerance and all that. But it was sure tempting.
We're making coffee right now. Hopefully nothing explodes.
EDITED TO ADD: And another thing that has me howling today...
Dear Automobile Driver:
You know those flashing lights and that loud beeping sound at the pedestrian crosswalk? That means that a pedestrian is, you know, attempting to cross.
It does not mean that you should go faster and blow through the intersection, without, I might add, apparently looking either to the left or to the right.
If they gave out tickets for being an asshole, I would have reported your license plate number to the police immediately.
Sincerely,
Me, crossing at the crosswalk with four heavy bags of groceries
◾ Tags:
